STORE OWNER: Why do my taxes keep going up?
PROPERTY ASSESSOR: Because the churches don’t pay taxes, so we have to make up the difference.
STORE OWNER: And why are there so many churches?
PROPERTY ASSESSOR: Because we’re not allowed to decide whether or not something’s a church.
STORE OWNER: (pause) Stop leaning on my [main_last]altar.[/main_last]
The above was copied from Not Always Right, a humor site.
I ran across this phrase while reading a recent news article:
We visited the Grand Canyon when I was a kid. I remember a ranger telling us why we shouldn‘t throw rocks into the canyon: “If everybody did it, they’d ﬁll up the canyon.”
Comment threads of news items can be pretty much echo chambers but every once in a while, someone posts a random comment that leads to a rich variety of punny responses. Witness this brilliant series:
I was stunned, stunned! I tell you, when I noticed this in a recent market advertising circular ☞
Seems there was an orchestra, with a master Violinist in ﬁrst chair. In the midst of ﬁnal rehearsal for a grand exposition of powerful music, a bizarre dissonance was heard.
The conductor stopped the piece as he nearly fell off his podium.