It is truly painful to watch the impeachment hearings when Devin Nunes (R-Fresno), a putative dairy farmer, keeps stepping in meadow muffins... And Nunes had only his Steele Dossier talking points to close with. When all you have is a milking bucket and chair, everything looks like a cow udder. But it takes a lot of pull. You just have to know how to tug the right way. That one
Steve: who's ready for a monday morning joke guyz? Steve: knock knock... Steve who's there? Steve: Irish Stu David: Oh hi, Stu, come on in, it's been a while. What brings you round this way? David: Just passing by, huh? Cool, cool. Just as long as Sarah didn't kick you out of the house, ha ha David: "Stu starts crying uncontrollably" David: Oh shit, she did? Man, I am so
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. When they lit a fire in the craft it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too. Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, was known as
Here are more punny comments by native wits who frequent one of the news sites I read. Dough unto others as you would have them dough unto you, for it is batter to give than to receive. We don’t knead a pun thread this early on a Monday. Bad bun puns are the yeast of our worries these days. Guess I have to learn how to roll with the punches.
[shor_intro]What kind of pun is created for the hard of hearing? Who knows? I sure don't. However, here is a selection copied from some random web page.[/short_intro] I tried to catch some fog. I mist. When chemists die, they barium. Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid.
A series of comments on a recent news article. We visited the Grand Canyon when I was a kid. I remember a ranger telling us why we shouldn‘t throw rocks into the canyon: "If everybody did it, they'd ﬁll up the canyon." And if everybody wanted to take rock samples, there’d be no rocks left. And if every person on the planet would form a line around the equator, arms
Comment threads of news items can be pretty much echo chambers but every once in a while, someone posts a random comment that leads to a rich variety of punny responses. Witness this brilliant series: Currently listening to Rachmaninoff…yeah…he Rachs my socks… Rach and Roll er…umm (slowly walks out of room) Nooo! Please come Bach with more musical puns! Can't offer you one because I'm still recouperin from the last
Funny how the obverse [seeing an atheist sign on a car] is never taken into account - drive around my county in PA and count the number of Christian-message-exhorting signs, billboards, bumper stickers, fish symbols on businesses…you’ll get exhausted soon. “drive around” “get exhausted” I see what you did there. There auto be a law. Someone needs to be Drawn and Quoted. You can also get tired. Can we please
The following comment thread began in comments relating to a post about the hunk of junk Ken Ham calls a replica of Noah's Ark. I'll only be truly impressed by a "replica" ark if someone actually makes one out of nothing but hand-hewn timber! Something like that, regardless of the motivation, would be craftsmanship and hard work worthy of respect. Anything else is just another pile of junk. Timber? Don't