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A Collection of Puns

Not everyone enjoys puns. Puns are rarely funny. Most people groan after hearing a pun. Here are some of my favorites.

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. When they lit a fire in the craft it sank, proving once and for all that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.

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Puns for the Hard of Hearing

What kind of pun is created for the hard of hearing? Who knows?  I sure don’t. However, here is a selection copied from some random web page.

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An Exacting Complication

I and two of my friends are at a convenience store buying drinks. My friend's drink is $2.73 including tax. He hands the cashier exactly $2.73. But the cashier doesn’t take it.

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Missionary Interrupts Sunday Football

Always keep a big quiet man as one of your friends
I remember ages ago I was at my cousin’s watching football with a few of his friends.

At one point I went to the kitchen, which was next to the front door, to get a beer refill when there was a knock on the door. Since I was right there, I answered it, only to find some Elmer Gantry-looking chap.

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