Puns for the Hard of Hearing

What kind of pun is created for the hard of hearing? Who knows?  I sure don’t. However, here is a selection copied from some random web page.

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Do We Really Need Two Fork Sizes?

Do you realize that trying to eat steak with a fish or shellfish fork would be pretty awkward?

An author who I follow sends out a monthly newsletter.  Recently he asked the question of why flatware sets include two sizes of forks.  I answered him by mentioning that there were specialized silverware items that make it easier to eat certain foods, such as eating steak with a fish fork.   Likewise trying to dig morsels of meat out of shrimp, crab, and snail shells is darn near impossible if you’re using a steak fork?  And trying to stir your coffee with a soup spoon or slurping soup with a teaspoon?

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Creative News Reporting

We bring you the latest in New Journalism

Today I was reading news articles on my iPad. I noticed that over the past week, every now and then there’s an article where the author appears to be paid by the word, based on the totally superfluous garbage used to set the scene, as if they were writing a play.

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Can you name this musical instrument?

Anyone who browses various news and entertainment sites on the web will see those little ads embedded in site sidebars, often with such titles as, How to cure acne with this simple solution, Can you name these 60s actors?, and The truth behind JFK’s 1972 disappearance.

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Limited Parking

I remember seeing one of those. It was near the dance hall where they were holding a hop.

I hear if those get out of hand, someone could croak.

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An Exacting Complication

I and two of my friends are at a convenience store buying drinks. My friend's drink is $2.73 including tax. He hands the cashier exactly $2.73. But the cashier doesn’t take it.

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Missionary Interrupts Sunday Football

Always keep a big quiet man as one of your friends
I remember ages ago I was at my cousin’s watching football with a few of his friends.

At one point I went to the kitchen, which was next to the front door, to get a beer refill when there was a knock on the door. Since I was right there, I answered it, only to find some Elmer Gantry-looking chap.

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